I know, it’s been a long time since I’ve written. But, don’t worry, I have plenty of excuses. Actually, coming up with excuses is one of the things that I do best. My biggest excuse is that I’ve been working in Nashville a lot recently. That’s not the best excuse, since I had a computer when I was in Nashville, but it’s better for you that I didn’t write while I was there. There’s only so many “yee haw,” ya’ll, and cowboy jokes that I can make before they get old. In fact, they’ve already gotten old. Also, I bought a condo. That’s usually a decent sized accomplishment, but I made it all the more impressive while doing it without money, in a horrible economy, while spending all of my time reading instead of coming up with extra cash. (Please send me money.)
Anyway, my reading has finally paid off. I knew this day would come. It doesn’t have to do with the most recent book I read, but it has to do with the “Woe is I” book I read a month or so ago. Yes, it also has to do with pancakes. I was lounging around with Melinda today when I threw out the idea of us eating some delicious pancakes before dinner. These aren’t your usual pancakes. They’re not even your usual DELICIOUS pancakes. These are pancakes from Mandalay Restaurant near Melinda’s, and they are some crazy pancake appetizer that you are allowed to eat at dinner without your mom getting mad or girlfriend giving you dirty looks. I told Melinda, “Let’s get some pancakes. That will whet your appetite. W-h-e-t.” I don’t know why I decided to spell out whet. I don’t think I was trying to be obnoxious. Sometimes I just spell words. Melinda quickly responded, “Whet is not a word.” Holy moly. For anyone that knows Melinda, you should know that I was in trouble. She’s always right. She’s right so much (always) that every time I try to prove her wrong I fail miserably and she makes me say to her, “Melinda, you’re right….as always.” It’s really degrading and something no man should have to do. You can see why I was concerned that she didn’t think whet was a word. I figured I was about to become less of a man. However, thanks to the power of the iPhone I was able to pull up the definition of “whet” and shove it in her face. Thanks to the silly grammar book I read, I knew that whet was a word. Unbelievable. I learned something.
I may not be right “as always” but I was right for once, and that’s good enough for me. Thank you books. I owe you one.